MAFS Australia 2027 does not premiere until February. The cameras are still rolling. The experts have not yet delivered a single meaningful piece of advice, and the couples have not yet been asked to write their feelings on a card at a dinner party while everyone else watches in silence. None of that has happened yet.

And it is already like this.

Since filming began in June, what has emerged — through paparazzi, production sources, and the kind of leaks that occur when you film a reality show in public — is a season that appears to have decided subtlety was for 2024. A groom who got married twice. A groom who left without saying goodbye to anyone. A groom who allegedly treated the experiment like a group chat. An intruder who walks into the dinner party already knowing one of the brides sitting at the table.

Production's solution to all of this: cut the wine to one glass per dinner party.

One glass. Per dinner party. On MAFS Australia.

We have questions. We have answers. Let's go.

CHRIS COLOMBO — The Groom Who Married Twice. His First Wife Is Still In The Experiment.

Melbourne carpenter Chris Colombo was matched with Bella Kajewski. Sources describe them as "one of the feistiest couples of the season," which on MAFS Australia is something you say about people who are going to do a lot of yelling at a dinner table. They did not work out.

Production's response was not to send Chris home. Production arranged a second wedding — this time to Chloe, a Pilates instructor — at a ceremony in Western Sydney kept entirely secret from the rest of the cast. Chris and Chloe then returned to the experiment at the fourth dinner party, entering alongside the other intruders.

The assembled cast at that dinner party encountered their colleague from earlier in the season arriving with a new wife.

Whether Bella was at that table has not been confirmed in any published report. We are filing this under "details that will resolve themselves in February." We are also filing it under "one of the better television setups this show has produced in recent memory."

Production sources are reportedly positioning Chris's arc as a redemption story — a second chance at love within the same experiment, modelled on Eliot Donovan's storyline from a previous season. This framing is optimistic. It is also the framing that makes the most compelling television. We respect the craft.

THE RUNAWAY GROOM — He Got Up. He Left. He Did Not Say Goodbye. He Did Not Leave a Note.

There is also the matter of a groom who is no longer on the show.

Not because of a commitment ceremony. Not because an expert had a frank conversation about personal growth. He simply left. According to multiple sources, this groom got up mid-season, walked out, and did not say goodbye to his bride, to the other contestants, or, apparently, to anyone at all. He was there. Then he was not there.

We respect this.

Not the abandonment, which seems hard on the bride left holding whatever cheese plate they had prepared. But the commitment to the exit. The wordlessness of it. On a show where people routinely produce televised speeches about their feelings on demand, at 10pm, at a dinner table, in front of people they have known for eleven days — there is something almost refreshing about a man who simply chose to leave rather than process his departure in front of a camera crew.

His identity has not been confirmed in any published report. His reasons have not been given. Production confirmed the departure was not related to the alcohol restrictions, which raises the obvious question of what the alcohol restrictions are actually accomplishing if someone still found reasons to leave sober.

WINTAH CUNNINGTON — The Groom Who Allegedly Texted Multiple Brides. Who Also Thought The Marriage Was Legal.

Wintah Cunnington is 29. Former coal miner. Father of two. Reportedly traditional, reportedly abstinent, reportedly very invested in the idea of marriage as a serious institution.

He is matched with Kodie Wyatt, a cosmetic nurse from Perth whose personal Instagram is set to private and who was observed actively avoiding cameras at their Walsh Bay wedding on July 30. Kodie and Wintah were photographed spending time separately during a filming break after approximately one week of living together.

According to production sources cited by multiple Australian outlets, Wintah allegedly sent private messages to multiple other brides in the experiment during filming — behind Kodie's back. This has not been confirmed by Nine or by Wintah. It is reported by sources close to production. We are applying the word allegedly and expecting it to do its job.

There is also this detail, which arrived separately and which we are choosing to place immediately after the previous paragraph: according to reports, Wintah entered the experiment believing the MAFS wedding ceremony would be legally binding.

As in: he apparently thought he was getting actually married.

This is a show that has been on television since 2015.

Kodie's Instagram is still private. Kodie avoided cameras at the wedding. Kodie appears to have had the correct read on this situation from fairly early on. We are not drawing conclusions. We are noting the available information in the order in which it becomes available.

ZAC NUNNS — Love Island Runner-Up. MAFS Intruder. Already Has History With Someone In The Room.

Zac Nunns is 28, from New Zealand, and finished as runner-up on Love Island Australia Season 5 in 2023 alongside British contestant Lucinda Strafford. They dated briefly. It did not last. Zac has since claimed on his podcast that Lucinda was communicating with another man during their relationship.

He joins MAFS 2027 as an intruder — the first Love Island Australia cast member to enter the experiment — paired with TikTok influencer Vanilla Milla. Production describes him as "outspoken, comfortable in front of cameras, and never afraid to involve himself in what's happening with the other couples." Production said this as though it were a recommendation.

The more pressing detail: according to sources cited by multiple outlets, Zac reportedly had a prior romantic connection with another bride already in the experiment before he arrived.

He walks into the dinner party. She is already there. Matched with someone else. At least one couple reportedly requested to stop filming immediately after this information emerged and asked to speak directly with production.

Production's response has not been published. We imagine the cameras stayed on.

On the matter of Chris Nield being banned from Zac's wedding: production reportedly blocked all communication between former and current participants during filming. This is a rule that exists. The fact that it required enforcing at Zac Nunns's wedding specifically is information we are choosing not to editorialize. We do not need to.

THE WINE SITUATION — One Glass. Per Dinner Party. For All Of This.

Production has implemented strict new alcohol rules for Season 14. Contestants are limited to one drink at dinner parties. Some couples — those who had arguments off camera — have been banned from keeping alcohol in their apartments entirely.

Let us be precise about what MAFS Australia dinner parties are. They are not quiet meals. They are the arena. The singular dramatic event around which this show has been constructed for over a decade. The dinner party is where people find out things they were not supposed to find out yet, say things they were not supposed to say, and then say them louder, while a camera operator moves in.

Production has decided this format was producing too much drama.

On MAFS Australia.

One glass.

For the table where Chris walks back in with a new wife. Where Zac sits down next to a bride he already knows. Where Wintah has allegedly been in everyone's DMs. Where the runaway groom used to sit.

One glass. Per person. For all of it.

THE NEW EXPERT — Marryam Chehelnabi. Overqualified. Incoming.

Nine has confirmed the new expert joining John Aiken and Alessandra Rampolla. Her name is Marryam Chehelnabi. She holds a Master of Science in Trauma-Informed Psychotherapy from the University of Sydney, a Master of Counselling and Applied Psychotherapy, Level III Gottman Method certification, and EMDR training. She was the lead therapist on SBS's Couples Therapy Australia. She is replacing Mel Schilling, who passed away from bowel cancer earlier this year — a loss this column notes with the seriousness it deserves.

Several outlets had previously reported that "Dr. Lurve" would be joining the panel. Nine has confirmed that is not the case. The new expert is Marryam Chehelnabi.

John Aiken, surveying the assembled cast during early filming, described them as having "extreme views" and "unrelenting standards." Alessandra Rampolla noted they had not yet fully revealed themselves.

Marryam Chehelnabi is about to sit across from all of this, with one glass of wine in front of her, and help people with their relationships. On camera. The Gottman Institute has trained her for many things. We wish her the specific kind of luck that training does not cover.